Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
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