Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
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Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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