so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
