I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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