I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I supernannyed him into submission
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
