stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
