Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.