it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude