wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
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