I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
