so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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