I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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