It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
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