Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
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