think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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