But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
