i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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