her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
