I think scott just propositioned me for sex
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Is it penis luge time yet?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
