i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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