so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
if i died would you start the facebook group?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
