Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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