Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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