You just made me feel so damn special
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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