I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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