I faked an abortion last night.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
