Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(208): View more from Idaho

I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.

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(917): View more from New York City

Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.

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(703): View more from Virginia

protesters in toronto definately have the best pot

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(248): View more from Michigan

I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was

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(479): View more from Arkansas

Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail

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(512): View more from Texas

Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow

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