He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
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I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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