some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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