Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
