Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
