..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
It's official drugs can't kill me
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
