he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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