I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
