i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
