i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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