that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
