I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
