I just made out with a guy for $7.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
