Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
