i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
