marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
