He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
