sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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