I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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