I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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