dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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