You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Sext me about skeletons
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
