Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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