i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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