Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
