operation harelip BJ is a go
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
