So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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