If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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